The taxes are the death of me

It's that time of year again. The time when I, for all intents and purposes, become a single parent. Tax season is upon us, and with Dave working 65+ hours a week for the next lifetime, aka until April 15, I get (mostly) full-time care of our little monster.

Who are you calling monster?

Last year during tax season was really hard for me, because as you all know, I was blessed with the world's fussiest baby. So I would spent full days either yelling, moping, or crying myself along with my crying baby. I was so lucky to have amazing friends and family that would come over and keep me company, and unbeknownst to them, keep me sane. It helped that we were in Brockport, because it was a little closer to the bulk of my people. Now, being out in Le Roy, we might as well be in a different country, because I don't like to drive to Rochester any more than the people in Rochester like the drive to Le Roy.

Do people not want to see this face?

This time around should be a little bit easier, although I'm sure I just jinxed myself by writing that. For one, Harrison is a much happier, mild-mannered human now. He for sure still gets in his moods, but those are easier to deal with because he now understands "no" and the tempered sound of my voice. And by understands, I mean fears. He also is obsessed with his Baby Einstein DVDs. Something about those movies can literally hypnotize children. And before you jump to conclusions and try to tell me that children his age shouldn't be watching any TV, let me say, quite frankly: I don't give a shit. My pediatrician said he can watch up to two hours a day (which does seem like a lot), so when I pop in one half hour DVD a day, I think he'll make it. Happy mom, happy baby. Actually with this relationship, I think it's more like happy baby, happy mom.

Do this look happy to you?

In other Harrison developments, he has learned a few key life lessons recently. For one, he has learned that he can open cabinets that will reveal fun objects of all shapes and sizes. In his mind, these are toys. In reality, we know those are not toys. Cups, plates, tupperware, etc.. are not toys. They are actually objects I will have to clean after he drags them all over the kitchen floor. But if the mantra of my life is now, "Happy baby, happy mom", then so be it.

He has also learned how to climb up his slide. This will help him to avoid playground bullying in his later years.

So B.A.

Finally, and most importantly, he has learned the workings of an iPhone better than some adults. He can get the phone off of it's lock screen, proceed to find the folder on my phone that has all of his apps in it, and choose said apps to entertain himself. It frightens me.

100

Hello, friends! Somehow I have made it to the 100th post! I can't believe that I started this blog when I was pregnant, thinking no one but my sister and parents would read it, and being more than content with that. Now, I had a toddler, and way more readers than I could have ever imagined, who actually think some of what I say is funny, which I also could have never imagined.

I wanted to do something special for the 100th post, but in failing to think of anything, I will just list a bunch of random things about me, my life, and Harrison (mostly Harrison):

1. For starters, having a blog is a great confidence booster. If you are ever in a slump, and feeling really bad about yourself, just write a blog post about how depressed and awful you are, and everyone will comment nice things.

2. Harrison is finally back to drinking milk. It was funny, because for the first year of his life, breastmilk was his favorite of all the things. Then, because babies are the pickiest creatures, you try to switch them to cow's milk, and you get a big hell no. I was really concerned about him not drinking milk, obviously for developmental and health reasons, but primarily because he is the spawn of dairy farmers. You cannot have the grandson of the dairy farmer not drink milk.

3. He is almost a year and a half old (in 24 days). How did this happen? He also still does not speak, which is an issue.

Come get me, ladies

4. Harrison is starting to push our buttons. I was talking to my sister around Thanksgiving, and praising him for being such a good listener and so well-behaved. Have I NOT LEARNED ANYTHING in the 17 months since giving him life? Parents, listen closely: you cannot comment on your child's behaviors out loud unless you want to permanently jinx them and have them do a 180 on you. So now he likes to not listen when we say "no", climb his little ass up the stairs by himself, pull my coffee mug, which is full of coffee, off the end table and present it to me like it's nbd, etc etc... It's getting fun around here.

I swear those aren't horns

5. It actually is a really fun stage to be in with him. Sarcasm aside, obviously he does not come without his challenges, but his insanity is hilarious. The kid is psychotic but in a funny way, if that makes sense.

6. I have a fair share of pet peeves. Drivers who post up in the left lane on the highway. Carrots. When desserts don't have frosting. A more recently developed pet peeve of mine is the clothing section for babies. Easily, there is 5x the amount of girls' clothes than boys' and the girls' stuff is way cuter. Anyone who shops for babies knows this.

7. The Colts won their first playoff game ever last Saturday! I have this theory for the upcoming game (which is tomorrow) that if I really, truly visualize them winning, they will just win. I know that is a load of crap in reality, but I'm sticking with it.

If you think dressing him in Colts attire helped them win too, then you are correct

8. Harrison's favorite things:

• Food: Reeses Peanut Butter Cups/Ice Cream. Not even kidding. Also, fruit.
• Book: Where's Spot, courtesy of Joy Roberts for gifting it to him.
• Christmas Toy: this god damn LeapFrog Laptop . Now I want to chuck it through a window and never look back.
• Favorite thing of all time: Mr. Bear. Definitely Mr. Bear.

9. Instead of a New Years Resolution, I decided on a Wedding Resolution.. so basically the same thing, I just have extra motivation since the word "wedding" is involved. I have never been one to exercise. Not just that I don't exercise, but I actually despise it. But like any bride-to-be, I have high (and very distant) hopes of being fit and toned come the wedding day. So as a test to myself, I am attempting to complete 30 days of "30 Day Shred" by Jillian Michaels. If anyone has done one of her workouts, you basically want to die the entire time, which is not helped by the fact that she is screaming through the TV at you, "YOU SHOULD FEEL LIKE YOU ARE ABOUT TO DIE RIGHT NOW!!!" "30 Day Shred" is one of her shorter workouts, so I feel as though I can work my way into the habit of working out every day, since it's a minimal amount of time. I'm on Day 4, only 26 left to go. 

10.  100 posts later, thank you for reading this blog and not thinking how sad and pathetic my life is. Actually, some of you may think that, which is fine because it's true, but thank you for not commenting those thoughts!